When Your Body Speaks: A Gentle Reflection on Trauma, Healing, and Listening Inward
Content Note:
This post mentions workplace bullying, anxiety, and PTSD. Please read gently if these topics feel tender for you.
Every once in a while, something comes across your screen at exactly the right time.
For me, it was a video from Adriene of Yoga With Adriene, someone I’ve followed for more than ten years. Her voice is soft, grounding, and honest in a way that reaches you before you even realize you needed it.
This week, her video reminded me of a chapter in my life I don’t talk about often…a season that changed me, deepened me, and eventually led me toward the work I do today.
It was the year I learned the power of a body scan.
Not in a peaceful yoga studio.
Not during a calm chapter of life.
But in 2021, when my nervous system was breaking under the weight of a toxic workplace, and my PTSD quietly resurfaced after fifteen years of silence.
At the time, I didn’t understand what was happening. I just knew that my body was sending signals I couldn’t ignore anymore.
The Season Everything Felt Heavy
That year, I experienced some of the most painful and destabilizing moments of my career. There was someone in the office whose bullying, projection, and constant criticism created an environment that felt emotionally unsafe.
And when I reached out for help, the support I desperately needed wasn’t there.
I remember sitting in the office of my senior leader, the GS-15 whose job it was to set the tone of the workplace. I tried to explain the constant pressure, the stress, the way I felt like I was being emotionally hit from all sides. I told him, with complete sincerity:
“I feel like I’m having grenades lobbed at me all day long.”
He just stared at me.
No compassion.
No curiosity.
No accountability.
Just a blank, bewildered expression.
Later, after a severe anxiety attack, I sat in my supervisor’s office shaking…overwhelmed, exhausted, terrified…only to be met with a dismissive, “You need help,” offered without a single attempt to understand why.
Looking back, I wish someone had recognized the signs.
I wish someone had listened.
I wish someone had shown even a small amount of human concern.
But that’s not what happened.
A Note on Accountability
I’m not sharing this to point fingers at individuals.
I am sharing it because the system itself failed me, the culture allowed it, and the silence around trauma and mental health in professional environments is still far too common.
This isn’t about calling anyone out…it’s about calling something forward.
What I went through was not my fault.
What you may be going through is not your fault either.
Learning to Listen Inward
During that time, my therapist recommended a book that still sits prominently on my bookshelf:
It helped me understand what my body already knew long before my mind caught up:
that trauma doesn’t disappear just because time has passed…
that stress accumulates when we don’t have safety…
that the body speaks when the environment becomes too much.
A body scan became one of the first tools that helped me reconnect with myself.
It taught me to slow down, notice, breathe, and soften my internal edges when everything around me felt harsh and overwhelming.
Instead of ignoring my physical cues, I began to sit with them.
Instead of blaming myself, I started listening inward.
Instead of pushing through, I learned to pause.
It didn’t remove the pain, but it helped me find my footing again.
If You Are in a Hard Season Right Now
I want you to know something I wish someone had said to me:
You are not imagining it.
You are not “too sensitive.”
You are not the problem.
And you deserve support, compassion, and safety..in your workplace, in your relationships, and in your own body.
If your body is speaking to you..tightening, trembling, shutting down, pushing you toward rest, it’s not betraying you.
It’s protecting you.
It’s asking you to listen.
It’s inviting you back home to yourself.
And if you’re walking through something heavy:
Please seek support.
Please reach out.
Please don’t carry it alone.
There is no shame in needing help…ever.
A Soft Invitation
If the idea of a body scan feels comforting, Adriene’s video is a beautiful place to begin. Her approach is gentle, grounding, and exactly what so many of us need when life becomes too loud.
And if your heart is hurting or your nervous system feels frayed, I hope this little corner of the internet reminds you:
You are worthy of compassion.
You are allowed to rest.
And you don’t have to walk through the heavy things alone.
xx,
Diana
